Foolf/Transcript

(The episode begins with Ben preparing to hit a football with a golf club.)

Ed: Fore! (hits football)

(The football flies and hits Daggett.)

Daggett: Ugh! You footballed me!

Ed: Dag, I was trying to say fore. It means watch out in golf.

Daggett: You should've said "hike!"

Ed: (puts football back on base) Oh yeah? How's this? Hike and fore.

(Eddy walks out of the trailer. Timmy follows him.)

Eddy: Someone yell hike and fore?

(Ed hits the football hard sending it flying high.)

Eddy: (surprised) Holy catnip Ed!

Timmy: Holy catnip Ed!

(The football flies towards Daggett and hits him again.)

Daggett: Oh, come on!

Eddy: (to Ed) You're a genius!

Timmy: You're a genius!

Eddy: I love eating toenails.

Timmy: I love ea- eww! You're gross!

Ed: Wait, why am I a genius?

Eddy: (Proudly) Two words: Best! Sports! Franchise! Ever!

Timmy: That's four words.

Ed: Here's two.

(Daggett runs behind a cactus.)

Daggett: Whatever!

Eddy: Tackle him!

Ed: Fore, HIKE!

(Eddy and Timmy tackle Ed, causing him to swing and throw his golf club through the air. It hits Daggett behind the cactus. Cuts to Eddy, Ed, and Timmy.)

Ed: I think I invented a new game!

Eddy: And we'll call it Foolf! Football and golf!

Timmy: It's perfect!

(Cuts to a dazed Daggett.)

Daggett: (normal voice) (dazed) Disagree.

(Cuts to Eddy's trailer)

Eddy: First things first. Before we play the game, we must focus on and perfect the most important part: Image!

Ed: Ta-da!

(Timmy and Plank shake their heads)

Ed: Hey, you know what I'm thinking?

(Daggett aims a red laser pointer at the curtains)

Ed: Another sport!

(Timmy sees the light reflecting)

Timmy: The dot! It's back!

Edd: Exit the curtain, please!

(Timmy pulls down the curtain)

Daggett: (laughs)

Timmy: Hey, I've taken gymnastics!

Eddy: That's it. Perfectas! We'll call it Foolf-Nastics.

Ed: Oh, you know what I'm thinking?

Eddy: Even more sports?

Ed: Exactly!

(The Foolf sign falls down onto Timmy)

(Cuts to the yard)

(Ed does an arm stretch with both arms before the game starts)

Ed: Fore, HIKE!

Eddy: Tackle him!

(Once again, Eddy and Timmy tackle Ed, sending the football flying. It hits a trampoline and bounces into a basketball net. It hits another trampoline and went through a sign. Finally, and once again, Daggett got hit.)

Ed: Woohoo! Now it is the perfect game!

Timmy: So what's it called?

Eddy: Foolf-Nastic-Volley-High-Basket-Baseball!

(Eddy, Ed and Timmy laugh)

Ed: Perfect!

Eddy: Perfect!

Ed: Brilliant!

Eddy: That's brilliant.

Daggett: (lying down) Yeah, don't worry about me, I'm totally fine. I'll just be molting over here. Alone. Under the bleachers.