Neighbor Roy/Transcript

* The episode begins with Tom and his friends at the museum.*

Ben: So, Tom, how does it feel to have a statue of you added to museum's Hall of Coolness?

Tom: I always knew that I was cool, but I never knew that I was "statue" cool.

Hank: Wow! I can't believe Tom's image will be next to the ruby that fell from space.

Tom: It's around this corner. Prepare to marvel at some marble. Huh?

* Tom sees a statue of a raccoon.*

Tom: Um, pardon me. But, uh, quick question. Why does this statue of me, uh, not look like me?

Assistant: Because it's not you. A cooler guy moved to town so he got a statue instead.

Tom: What?!

Assistant: Some fella named Roy.

* Everyone chats about Roy.*

Babysitter: Roy babysat our family once and planted two gardens just for fun.

Wesley: I choked on a grape once and Roy saved my life.

Tom: Who the heck is Roy?!

* The gang head back inside the studio.*

Angela: Oh, one little museum statues isn't a big deal. This isn't going to change our lives or anything.

Tom: Well, yeah, I guess that's true.

Ginger: Guys, look! (The movers are preparing for Roy to arrive) We're getting a new neighbor. And they have a bunch of cool stuff! I wonder who it is.

Roy: What if he's a jerk?

* The five scream.*

Roy: (laughs) No, I'm just kidding. He's me. Hi, new neighbors. I'm Roy.

Tom: Hmm...

* The scene cuts to the theme song.

* Tom shows the gang his pie.*

Tom: What do you think of my "welcome to the neighborhood" present for Roy, huh?

Ben: What a nice gesture, especially after Roy dethroned you as the coolest person in town--

Tom: Uh, Ben.

Ben: --according to the museum.

Tom: Ben?

Ben: But what do museums know?

Tom: Ben!

* Ben cowers*

Ben: Oh!

Tom: It's fine. In fact, that's why I'm giving him this pie, so that Roy can be like, "A homemade pie? Tom is way cooler than I am!"

Angela: So, it's not a nice gesture at all.

Tom: Mm-hmm.

Roy: Hey, guys.

* Tom gasps*

Roy: Just dropping by to give you a little something just to show you how much I appreciate being your new neighbor.

* Ginger opens the box to find a Lightening Man action figure.*

Ginger; A Lightening Man action figure!

(Ginger puts on his glasses and he pushes the button on the action figure, causing it to shine the inside studio.*

Ginger: They stopped making these after all the lightening injuries.

Tom: Whoa!

Ben: A Blue Flame 5,000? That's the best Bunsen burner you can buy!

* Tom growls*

Hank: Wow! The "Bongo and McGillicuddy" complete box set! *kisses box, then opens it* It even has the Christmas special everyone hated!

* Tom growls again*

Angela: Whoa. Are these real gold?

Roy: Mm-hmm. And real microphones.

Angela: (singing) Wow, Roy! You shouldn't have!

Tom: (angered) Yeah, Roy. You shouldn't have.

Roy: I wanted us to get off on the right foot, so I did a little research on y'all to see what you look like.

Tom: Well, that's creepy.

* Angela and Roy look at Tom, angrily*

Roy: (laughs) Oh, Tom, I wish I could be as hilarious as you. By the way, *holds up large pie* I didn't forget about you.

Tom: (shocked) Oh.

Ginger: That pie looks amazing!

* Angered, Tom throws the pie in the trash.*

Roy: Well, it's not a contest. And before I go, I'm having a little housewarming shindig tonight.

* Roy passes the large pie at Tom.*

Roy: You all should come if you're not too busy.

Tom: Yeah. You know...

Angela: We'd love to!

Ben: Yes!

* Tom falls on the floor with the pie in his face. Cuts to the gang heading to the party.*

Tom: I just don't understand why we are going to some stranger's party.

Angela: Roy is not a stranger, he's your neighbor. Stop being such a grump.

Tom: Fine. But don't come complaining to me when this party is super...lame?

* As the gang enter the party, a photographer take a picture of them.*

Photographer: *passes picture to them* For your memories.

* Tom spots Roy chatting with the group.*

Roy: So I said "Senator, that's not an avocado." The funny thing is, it was an avocado! He was right. I was wrong.

* The group laugh. The gang find this cool, except Tom, who is jealous of him. Cuts to Roy playing the piano. Tom is still jealous and Angela seems impressed. As Roy finishes, he does a "come here" sign at Angela.*

Angela: 🎵Everybody give a toast🎵

* Tom is very angry and is about to squish the grapes.*

Angela: 🎵To the host with the most.🎵

* Tom gets even more angry and squishes the grape and Hank catches the drips with his cup.*

Angela: 🎵Oh boy, shooby-doo bop-bop-doo🎵

Ginger: Tom! Roy has his own game room! Come play extreme foosball with me!

* Ginger grabs Tom's arm to find the "game room".*

Tom: Ginger, which one of these way-too-many-doors did you go into?