Mission: Delete/Transcript

[laughter]

00:13

-Angela! -Hey, guys.

00:15

-I mean... Hello. -What's so funny?

00:17

Are you watching that video with the golfing babies again?

00:19

Uh, sure. That's exactly what we're doing. Boy, can those infants putt!

00:24

That video never gets old-- Wait a minute!

00:27

Those babies have a terrible short game.

00:30

Ah! Ben, she's on to us. Quick, we have to destroy the computer!

00:34

-Ha-ha! -Don't-- Uh.

00:36

[gasps] Uh, Tom?

00:38

-What's going on here? -Okay, fine.

00:41

-Ben found your old MyFace page. -What? Me?

00:43

You're the one who came and said,

00:45

"Check out all these hilarious videos Angela used to post."

00:49

-I didn't make hilarious videos. -Well, you weren't trying to, but you did.

00:54

Hey world, it's Ang.

00:56

I was gonna tell you why I hate the system,

00:59

but I'd rather let my flute do the talking.

01:02

[tuneless squeaking]

01:05

[screams]

01:07

Oh, come on. It's not "screaming" bad.

01:09

It's simply a relic from your past that only the three of us will ever see.

01:14

[laughing] Tom, those embarrassing videos you sent of Angela are so embarrassing!

01:19

-[Ginger] She's gonna be embarrassed. -If I were her, I'd be embarrassed.

01:23

-How embarrassing! -Yeah!

01:25

Angela, how do you feel about this?

01:27

-Uh... I mean... -Aagh!

01:35

♪ Wa-oah! ♪

01:44

Today's tutorial is how to cut the fingers off your gloves.

01:49

-[laughter] -Warning, take your gloves off first.

01:52

I don't believe this, I thought this site was part of my past,

01:55

buried forever, like my baby teeth and that lamp I broke.

01:57

Nothing's buried forever on the internet.

02:00

That's what makes it such a marvelous cornucopia of knowledge!

02:04

-Statement made. -That's it. I'm deleting this now!

02:07

-Angela, come on. It's not that bad. -Really?

02:09

Let's show everyone your page and see how you like it!

02:12

Tom: Go ahead. I was as cool then as I am now.

02:15

[beatboxing]

02:18

Teen Tom: [rapping] My name is Tom and I'm here to say That I'd rather spit rhymes than write my history essay! Oh, yeah, boy!

02:26

[laughter]

02:28

Tom: See, Angela? If you can't laugh at yourself once in a while--

02:31

Teen Tom: Hey, now let me show you how good I got at practice kissing.

02:35

[laughter]

02:36

Tom: We don't need to watch the rest!

02:40

-[laughter]

Teen Tom: Oh. I'm going to start crying again. And lately I cry so much.

02:50

We've got to delete these profiles.

02:55

[alarm]

02:56

I can't remember the last time I logged into this thing.

02:59

[computer] Please answer the following security question.

03:01

What is your favorite berry from seven years ago?

03:04

What? I don't remember that!

03:10

Profile locked. Page cannot be deleted.

03:13

Ah! This is terrible. What if my fans find this?

03:16

What if they already have?

03:18

And if people find Tom's page, he'll have to stop being mayor.

03:22

He'll have to shut down his company.

03:24

He'll have to live in a cabin in the desert filled with splinters.

03:28

No! You've got to help us, Ben.

03:30

Isn't there some kind of nerd magic you can use to delete these pages?

03:34

No, what do you want me to do,

03:36

break into MyFace headquarters and delete them manually?

03:38

Yeah! Let's do that! Good thinking, Ben.

03:41

I wasn't being serious. Besides, MyFace is owned by...

03:46

...the CEO?

03:50

Whoa! I was really in suspense about who it was going to be when we walked here.

03:54

Ugh, the CEO is the worst.

03:56

I know! It would be impossible to break in there.

03:59

-Come on, Ben. Anything is possible. -[scoffs]

04:02

Not this anything. The MyFace servers have three layers of security. One!

04:06

Cameras over every entrance, watched by a security guard.

04:09

Nobody gets in without being seen.

04:11

Two! His trusty secretary, Pilar. No one gets past her.

04:16

Three! A triple-locked, steel-plated security door

04:19

that leads to the MyFace server room.

04:21

A complete dead end.

04:23

So, that's what we're up against. Let's just go home.

04:26

Sorry, guys.

04:27

Sure wish this could be like that scene in the movie, Casino Heist 2: Double Down,

04:32

where a group of five friends break into their enemy's building

04:34

and pull off an epic heist.

04:36

An epic heist? How'd they do it?

04:39

-Simple! With an elaborate scheme! -Huh.

04:41

We're good at elaborate schemes. Let's do this!

04:44

-Yeah! -[sighs] I'll clear my schedule.

04:47

Yeah!

04:48

[cool guitar riff]

05:15

It's not too late, guys. We can still back out of this crazy plan.

05:19

-Hey, I like our plan. -Yeah, Ben, don't knock the plan.

05:22

All right, fine. Let's just get this over with.

05:25

Initiating phase one, security guard distraction. Let's hope he takes the bait.

05:33

Whoa. Are those pretzels? This is my lucky day.

05:38

Huh, it worked! Proceed to phase two.

05:41

[humming]

05:48

May I help you?

05:50

[clears throat] Happy birthday!

05:52

I am a birthday-gram, here to serenade you on your special day.

05:55

-My birthday was five months ago. -Oh, uh, uh-oh.

05:58

I mean, five months after your birthday can be the most special time of all.

06:03

And that is what my song is all about.

06:06

[tuning note]

06:07

♪ It's your birthday, not today But don't forget you were born! ♪

06:13

♪ Everybody has a birthday How many years ago was yours? ♪

06:18

40! Oh, uh...

06:20

-30? -[Angela] Okay.

06:22

She can't see us. Let's roll.

06:25

Ooh, look, balloons!

06:27

Do you like them?

06:29

Should I be jealous, balloon kisser?

06:34

-[Ben] This crazy plan might really work. -Hm.

06:37

I feel so alive, guys!

06:38

Plus, I'm making some sweet pretzel bucks on the side.

06:41

Next customer, pl--

06:43

-Hello, Benjamin. -Oooh!

06:47

♪ There's lots of days in a year ♪

06:50

Let's count them all, shall we?

06:52

One! ♪ January 1st ♪

06:54

Two! ♪ January 2nd ♪

06:57

Three! ♪ January-- ♪

06:58

-Ahem. -Uh, hi, Mr. CEO. Want a balloon?

07:04

[evil laugh]

07:08

-[Tom] Come on, run faster! -[Angela panting]

07:14

Hey there... Moose.

07:17

Ha-ha.

07:18

Hi. We're just two average computer technicians

07:21

here to fix some average computers!

07:23

So if you could please let us into that room, we'll be in and out in a jiff.

07:26

[alarm blares]

07:31

And so the final piece of the puzzle falls into place.

07:34

Tom and Angela, skulking around my building like thieves in the night.

07:38

Well, bad news - it's day.

07:41

Fine. You've caught us. We'll just have to...

07:45

Run!

07:47

Oh, come on, Moose! We trusted you.

07:49

I want to know exactly what you're trying to pull here.

07:54

Let me guess, trying to delete your embarrassing old MyFace pages?

07:57

-Yup. You hit the nail right on the head. -Hank!

08:00

Well, he figured everything else out. He was going to get there.

08:03

Oh, this is perfect.

08:05

I'm going to share your humiliating MyFace pages with the entire world!

08:10

[evil laugh]

08:12

You monster!

08:14

Huh? Put this cart back. It's a tripping hazard!

08:17

-But boss... -I said it's a tripping hazard!

08:26

And as for you...

08:28

-Whoa! -Ow!

08:33

-Hm, I think he bought it! -Oh, he bought it, all right.

08:36

Let's move to phase three!

08:40

[banging]

08:45

[Ben] Okay, Ginger, there should be an emergency exit

08:47

on the northwest side of the room.

08:49

Ben, I just crawled out of a tiny box into a dark room.

08:52

How am I supposed to know which way-- [gasps]

08:54

Oh, is it the door that says "exit?"

08:58

-Hey, guys! -Whoa!

09:00

-Even I didn't see this plot twist coming. -You were there for the planning.

09:03

I didn't want to spoil it for myself, so I didn't listen.

09:05

All right. Let's do this.

09:09

[Ben] I've got it.

09:10

Tom, Angela, your pages are ready for deletion.

09:13

I've got three words for you, page.

09:16

You are...

09:18

Hm?

09:20

Huh.

09:25

Teen Angela: This next song is called "You Don't Know Me, Mom!" Three-four! ♪You don't know me, Mom You don't understand Let me stay out after ten After ten! ♪

09:41

-[laughing] -Go ahead, Angela. Delete it.

09:43

Angela: Guys, this was my first show ever. I totally forgot about this! I shouldn't be embarrassed. If I never wrote bad songs, I would have never learned to write good songs. This is who I was. I don't care if the CEO shows it to the world. I'm not deleting it.

09:59

Tom: You know what? Angela's right. I'm gonna keep my page, too.

10:03

Teen Tom: Good news, internet! I got to the next level of practice kissing. No more crying for Tom!

10:12

[boing]

10:14

-[birds tweeting] -Uh...

10:16

[sobbing]

10:19

[chuckles] Ah.

10:21

Tom: Come on, Angela. Let's go.

10:24

Ginger: Hey, guys! Look!

10:26

Teen CEO: I've been thinking a lot about money. Like, what's it even for? What if money was peace?

[laughter]

10:34

CEO: I really got those losers this time! Huh? What's this, an email?

10:40

♪ Peace and love, love and peace ♪

10:43

-Aaagh! -♪ Love and peace, peace and love ♪