Forgotten Kiss/Transcript

(Previously...)

(Scene shows Ben hiding in his cardboard box hut from A Secret Worth Keeping: Part Two.)

Angela: What are you doing in here?

Ben: I'm hiding from Tom so I don't tell him your stupid secret.

(Scene cuts to Angela at the party.)

Angela: (angrily) Don't you dare say anything!

Ben: (whimpers) But-

Angela: Not a word!

(Scene cuts back to the box hut.)

Angela: You must keep the secret from Tom.

Ben: (angrily) Yeah, but how?

(Ben gets an idea and writes equations on the boxes.)

(Scene cuts to Ben introducing the Mind Eraser.)

Ben: (echoing) Behold the solution to our secret. (holds up Mind Eraser)

Angela: (holds Mind Eraser) ...things we do to pretend we're not in love. Well, I mean, not love, but, you know what I- here you go. (activates Mind Eraser)

(Ben's memories are erased.)

(Scene cuts to Tom receiving his company back.)

Ben: Everything is back to normal.

Tom: Well, maybe not everything. (looks at Angela romantically and kisses her)

Ginger: (waiting) I can't watch this.

Hank: Aww.

(Ginger takes a photo of Tom and Angela kissing.)

Ginger: Ugh!

Hank: (picks up Mind Eraser) What does this do? (activates Mind Eraser)

(End of flashback. The friends head to the diner for Angela's birthday party.)

Hank: (carrying banner) Phew! I'm so excited to be celebrating Angela's birthday at the diner! I'm announcing it as if we don't already know we're here to celebrate Angela's birthday at the diner!

Angela: (smiles) You guys. This is so sweet, but totally unnecessary. Uh, don't drag that banner, Hank.

(Ginger is recording Angela.)

Ginger: That was okay, Angela, buy "okay" is the enemy of great! So let's try that line again with feelings.

Ben: Ginger, why are you recording everything we do?

Ginger: Oh, I'm just in the zone making my documentary.

Hank: (surprised) A documentary? That's my favorite type of boring movie!

Ginger: Than you'll love this one because it's about you guys, instead of interesting people.

(Rhonda appears, annoyed as if she has served the friends multiple times.)

Rhonda: Ugh! Here we go again. Should I show you to the same table you always do this birthday thing at?

Tom: Same table?

(One of the tables has birthday party paraphernalia scattered all over.)

Ben: (upset) Looks like something already had a birthday party here.

Rhonda: (mimics Ben) "...birthday party here." Says the same thing every time.

Tom: (looks) Huh? (reads banner on the table) "Happy Birthday, Angela."

Angela: What?

Hank: Ginger, are you getting this?

Ginger: Uh-huh.

Hank: Your documentary just turned into a docu-mystery!

(theme song plays)

Tom: This is so weird. It's like there was already a birthday party for Angela before we got there. Are you having birthday parties with another group of friends behind our backs?

Angela: What? No! Are you guys throwing birthday for another Angela behind my back?

Ben: I'll tell you what I'd like to know. (shivers) Why is it so cold in August?

Tom: Yeah, Angela?

Angela: What? It's not my fault.

Hank: Why is all our stuff on the driveway?

(The friends' furniture and belongings are on the driveway.)

Tom: Wait, what happened?

Hank: (points to corn plant) Ooh, I just planted this corn a week ago!

(The corn plant is fully grown.)

Hank: So singing to it does work!

The Landlord: Hey, there you are. I warned you, did I not? Now this is what happens when you don't pay your rent for three months.

(The Landlord puts down a sign in the front yard reading, "For Rent," implying that the friends were evicted.)

Tom: Huh? But we did pay our rent.

The Landlord: Every day, the same thing. You all like, "But we did pay our rent," and I'm all like, "No, you did not," huh? Incompetents.

Ginger: Uh-oh, this is getting serious.

Tom: Will someone please tell me what is going on here?

Ginger: Tom, there's a reason I've been recording you-

Tom: (interrupts) I mean, first the diner, now this?

Ginger: But, Tom-

Tom: (interrupts) Someone's got some explaining to do.

Ginger: I know what happened! I'll show you! (shows video)

Ben: (ignores Ginger) My precious stuff! Strewn on the driveway like not-precious stuff. (kisses computer)

Ginger: Ben-

(The friends continue ignoring Ginger, deeming him unworthy of their attention. Ginger continues trying to get the friends' attention, but to no avail.)

Ben: (to Tom) This is your fault! You goofed off too much and didn't pay the rent!

Tom: I paid! Hank must not have paid!

Hank: What? I did pay. Ben must not have paid. Ben, I'm only saying that 'cause it's your turn to be blamed.

(Tom, Ben and Hank argue about the eviction.)

Ginger: (screams) Listen to me! Your minds have-

Friends: (angrily) Ginger!

Ben: Can't you see the grown-ups, who know a lot more than a kid like you, are trying to solve a serious crisis?!

Ginger: But- aw, forget it.

Angela: Well, until we figure out what's going on, you guys can stay at my apartment.

Tom: Yes, great idea! I mean, you know, whatever the group wants to do.

(The friends move into Angela's apartment. Angela finds Hank trying to carry in the corn plant.)

Angela: Whoa, whoa, whoa, how much stuff do you have?

Hank: I had to bring these. They may be tall, but still young to be out at night by themselves.

(Ben brings in a kayak.)

Angela: Oh, kind of running out of room in here.

Ben: Well, your couch takes up a lot of space, but you don't hear me complaining about that. Now, Tom, help me move this to the closet-

Tom: (interrupts) Sorry, I can't, because I...

Hank: Ooh, uh, can't stand working?

Tom: Of course not. I, uh, need to do something... (gets notification on phone) ...ooh, on my phone! That's right, on my phone!

Hank: Oh, that makes sense.

(Ben and Angela bump into things while trying to carry the kayak.)

Tom: Whoa, hey, wait a minute, guys! For reals! I just got an email from the CEO. He's inviting us over to talk about our inventions!

Friends: Yes! Awesome!

Ben: Fantastic! Finally, some good news!

Tom: It gets better! He wants us to meet him... three months ago. (clears head) Three months ago?!

Ben: What? How could you miss a meeting with the CEO and not notice for three months?!

Tom: But, but-

Ben: You know what? I don't want to hear your excuses. (tries to shove kayak into closet)

Hank: Just call the CEO and make another appointment.

Tom: And what exactly should I say? "Sorry for keeping you waiting for three months?"

Hank: No. Say "two-and-a-half months" and see if he notices.

(Ben appears with blueprints.)

Ben: Guys, I found these plans for a mind-erasing device in my handwriting, but I don't ever remember writing these.

Hank: Wow, a mystery wrapped in a mystery wrapped inside of another unrelated mystery!

Ben: Is it possible that I invented a mind-erasing device that then erased our memories?

Hank: I don't remember that happening, so yes, it is possible.

Angela: It would explain a few things.

Tom: And it's the perfect excuse for why we missed our meeting!

Ben: Tom, the CEO is not going to believe such a lame excuse.

(Tom calls the CEO anyway.)

Tom: (on phone) Hello! Tom of Tom and Ben Enterprises here. Now, I know it's been two-and-a-half months since you invited us to meet, but here's the thing. Our minds were erased, and- (gasps) You believe me? You want us to come over right away? Even better! (ends call and laughs)

Angela and Hank: (cheers)

Ben: That seems way too convenient.

Hank: See? Two-and-a-half months.

(Scene cuts to the CEO's office.)

CEO: (to his goldfish) Who's the best friend I ever had? Who is? You know it's you, Goldie! Do you like swimming over here? Do you like swimming over here? You do, Goldie-fish. (hugs fishbowl) Daddy loves you. (kisses fishbowl)

(The friends enter.)

Hank: (brings his corn plant) Phew, I'm just lucky I didn't set off the corn detector at the security gate. Come on, boys!

CEO: (to goldfish) ...and when you're done, we're going to play more games! Yes, we are!

(Tom clears his throat.)

CEO: Hey, Tom and Ben! My favorite inventors! And, oh, is that corn? Ah, corn. Reminds me of the simple farming values: hard work and honesty. That's why I buy farms and replace the people with machines! 'Cause what's more hardworking and honest than machines, right? (chuckles)

Tom: Yeah, so true, I mean, I always say that!

Ben: Sir, we are so sorry for missing the meeting.

CEO: (chuckles) No apologies necessary. We cool. Ever since I got new Goldie here, I'm a more kick-back person. We've already made so many great memories together. (to Goldie) Goldie! Who's a goldie fish? Daddy loves you! Daddy loves you! (kisses fishbowl)

Tom: Right. Sorry again for missing this meeting, but like I said on the phone, we have a really good excuse, 'cause it turns out our memories were actually erased by our latest invention.

CEO: Yes, a mind-erasing device! Imagine how dangerous that would be in the wrong hands. Of course, I'd use it for good, and making myself CEO: Chief Everything Officer!

Tom: Oh, so that's what that stands for.

Angela: How would that be good?

CEO: It'd be good for me! Anyway, Ben, how would one... I don't know... take such a device and boost its power to... I don't know... to mind-erase everyone on the planet?

Ben: Well, for starters, I'm gonna need extra batteries...

(The CEO shows a board full of equations.)

CEO: Skip to the end, I already know the starters.

Ben: Ah, okay, I do suppose much of it is self-explanatory-

Angela: Wait, why would you need to know that, Mr. CEO? (gasps) Unless you had the Mind Eraser!

(Tom and Hank gasp.)

CEO: (takes out improved Mind Eraser) You mean this Mind Eraser right here? Wow, got me again, Angela!

Angela: Yeah, I did! Wait, I did? Wait, again?

CEO: That's 93 straight times you've figured it out before the boys.

Tom: Wait, you've been erasing our memories!

CEO: Yep! I took the Mind Eraser from you three months ago and I've been modifying it every day since! It'd already be done, but Angela always figures out my plan before I get all the info I need from Ben, so I have to erase your memories again!

Tom: Again?!

(A montage is shown of Ben giving details to the CEO, but Angela figuring out the CEO's intentions, so the CEO erases their memories.)

Ben: (to the CEO) Well, let's see here. You'd need at least three antennae.

CEO: (takes notes) Fascinating. How long should they be?

Ben: Oh, probably no longer than-

Angela: Hold on, why would you need to know that, Mr. CEO? (gasps) Unless you had the Mind Eraser!

(Hank gasps.)

CEO: (takes out Mind Eraser) Okay, uh, look right here, and... (activates Mind Eraser)

(Another instance is shown.)

Ben: Tungsten! Antennae must be made of tungsten.

CEO: Really?

Angela: Why would you need to know that? (gasps) Unless you had the Mind Eraser!

(Hank gasps)

CEO: (takes out Mind Eraser) Eh, alright, hang on... (activates Mind Eraser)

(Yet another instance is shown.)

Ben: Mmm, I think you'd be better with an amplifying cone.

CEO: Oh, that's brilliant!

Angela: (gasps) You have the Mind Eraser!

(Hank gasps.)

(The CEO groans and activates the Mind Eraser.)

(Concludes montage.)

CEO: It was exhausting, going through the same thing every day. Except for the corn. The corn is new.

(Hank gasps and defends his corn plant.)

CEO: And now, I just need one last piece of info.

Ben: Ha! You think I would ever tell you that what you need is to split the oscillation fields into multi-dimensional quadrants? No chance!

CEO: Multi-dimensional quadrants, eh? Got it!

Angela: Ben!

Ben: Gah!

CEO: Now, to memory erase you and take over the world. (holds Mind Eraser) Ha, Monday is fun-day.

Tom: Wait, the corn, the corn is new! Everybody, get behind the corn!

(The friends hide behind the corn.)

CEO: (walks towards corn plant) No fair, I just want to wipe your memories so I could rule the world! (laughs)

(The CEO leaps near the corn plant. The friends reposition themselves so that they are hidden from the CEO.

(Tom leaps on the CEO and tries to take the Mind Eraser.)

Tom: Give me the Mind Eraser!

(The Mind Eraser is sent flying into the air.)

Tom and CEO: (slowed) Noooooooo!

(The Mind Eraser lands in Goldie's bowl and is activated.)

CEO: Goldie! Goldie, do you remember me? Please, say something! Let me know you remember our good, good times! (sobs)

(Tom takes the Mind Eraser from the fishbowl.)

CEO: They've taken my one friend away from me! This just got personal! No, super-personal!

Tom: C'mon, let's get out of here!

(The friends run away.)

CEO: Extra-super-personal! Times infinity! (cries out)

(Scene cuts to the garage. Tom steps on the Mind Eraser in front of the camera to destroy it. He cries out in pain.)

Tom: Ah! Ah!

Ginger: Now who doesn't remember stuff?

Tom: (hops on one foot) Why did we invent a Mind Eraser with such sharp edges?

Ben: At least now, it's destroyed. The greatest thing I ever made... broken. Done.

Hank: And the Landlord let us move back in after no one would rent it because we left a "distinctive and unpleasant odor." (sniffs armpit) Oh.

Ginger: And that's how my friends learned they should always listen to me when I'm trying to tell them something important.

Tom: Okay. Turns out you were the only one of us who didn't have his mind erased 93 times.

Ben: So, did we miss anything else that was important?

Ginger: Well, we did plan for an invasion of alien brain suckers that got handled. Oh, and then you all became billionaires...

Ben: About time!

Ginger: But then you screwed it up.

(Ben groans.)

Hank: Yeah, we always do that.

Ginger: After that, it was a lot of having that birthday party over and over, Tom and Angela kissing, walking back to the garage confused-

Angela: (interrupts) Wait, did you say kissing?

Tom: That's ridiculous.

Ginger: It's not a lie! Look! (shows video on phone)

Angela (in video): But, Tom...

Tom (real time): I don't see any kissing.

Angela: Yeah, me either, what are you-

(Tom and Angela gasp, implying that the video showed them kissing.)

Angela: We...

Tom and Angela: We kissed.

Tom: Wow!

(credits roll)