Foolf/Transcript

(The episode begins with Ben preparing to hit a football with a golf club.)

Ben: Fore! (hits football)

(The football flies and hits Pierre.)

Pierre: Oof! You footballed me!

Ben: Hey, I said "fore". That means watch out.

Pierre: "Fore" means watch out in golf. You footballed me. You should've said "hike".

Ben: (puts football back on base) Oh yeah? How's this? Hike and fore.

(Tom walks out of the trailer with an iPad. Ginger follows him.)

Tom: Did someone yell hike and fore?

Man on Tom's Tablet: Did someone yell hike and fore?

(Ben hits the football hard sending it flying high.)

Tom: (surprised) Holy catnip Ben!

Ginger: Holy catnip Ben!

(The football flies towards Pierre and hits him again.)

Pierre: Oh, come on!

Tom: (to Ben) You're a genius!

Ginger: You're a genius!

Tom: I love eating toenails.

Ginger: I love ea- eww! You're gross!

Ben: Wait, why am I a genius?

Tom: (Proudly) Two words: Best! Sports! Franchise! Ever!

Ginger: That's four words.

Ben: Here's two.

(Pierre flies behind a cactus.)

Pierre: (in high-pitched voice) Whatever!

Tom: Tackle him!

Ben: Fore, HIKE!

(Tom and Ginger tackle Ben, causing him to swing and throw his golf club through the air. It hits Pierre behind the cactus. Cuts to Tom, Ben, and Ginger.)

Ben: I think I invented a new game!

Tom: And we'll call it Foolf! Football and golf!

Ginger: It's perfect!

(Cuts to a dazed Pierre.)

Pierre: (normal voice) (dazed) Disagree.

(Cuts to Tom's trailer)

Tom: First things first. Before we play the game, we must focus on and perfect the most important part: Image!

(Tom and Ben are wearing golf and football clothes.)

Ben: Ta-da!

(Ginger and Gina shake their heads)

Ben: Hey, you know what I'm thinking?

(Pierre aims a red laser pointer at the curtains)

Ben: Another sport!

(Ginger sees the light reflecting)

Ginger: The dot! It's back!

(Ginger pulls down the curtain)

Pierre: (laughs)

Ginger: Hey, I've taken gymnastics!

Tom: That's it. Perfectas! We'll call it Foolf-Nastics.

Ben: Oh, you know what I'm thinking?

Tom: Even more sports?

Ben: Exactly!

(The Foolf sign falls down onto Ginger)

(Cuts to the yard)

(Ben does an arm stretch with both arms before the game starts)

Ben: Fore, HIKE!

Tom: Tackle him!

(Once again, Tom and Ginger tackle Ben, sending the football flying. It hits a trampoline and bounces into a basketball net. It hits another trampoline and went through a sign. Finally, and once again, Pierre got hit.)

Ben: Woohoo! Now it is the perfect game!

Ginger: So what's it called?

Tom: Foolf-Nastic-Volley-High-Basket-Baseball!

(Tom, Ben and Ginger laugh)

Ben: Perfect!

Tom: Perfect!

Ben: Brilliant!

Tom: That's brilliant.

Pierre: (lying down) Yeah, don't worry about me, I'm totally fine. I'll just be molting over here. Alone. Under the bleachers.